How to stay sane in cycles of change

Going through big cycles of change is ROUGH, I won’t lie to you. It’s derailing, it’s confusing, it’s scary and it’s something we all have to deal with from time to time.

Change can happen in any part of our lives: career, relationship, home, but also in our self development. When we grow, un-learn certain behaviours, work with a coach, release limiting believes, it’s all change.

And eventhough many changes are ultimately for the best, they can be super challenging when you’re in the middle of them.

I’m currently going through a big cycle of change in multiple areas: me & my family have bought a beautiful new home so we’re moving house. But I’m also rethinking how I want to serve, so my business is changing. And I’m also upleveling in my spiritual awareness and practice. These changes are all great, honestly, but it does make me feel like I’m in the middle of a hurricane. Over the years, I’ve found a few ways to help me deal with phases like this, and I want to share my learnings with you.

The risk of change

Every discomfort and dis-ease ‘(distance from ease’) shows up in our auric field first. The stress and discomfort that comes with handling change is among them. When we are comfortabel with our physical system and tune in regularly to feel into the signs & signals it’s sending us, we are very often able to catch discomfort before it gets out of hand. If we don’t take that tune-in time, we force our nervous system to get drastic.

So the biggest risk I see with cycles of change is that you don’t really acknowledge what’s happening. Change takes its toll on our nerves and our physical system, and when you don’t really acknowledge it, and maybe even try to ignore the impact it’s having, you push down the signals your body sends you thus pushing your nervous system to increase the pressure. That ‘pressure’ can take the form of anxiety attacks, extreme stress, illness, burn out etc. But it really doesn’t have to be that way.

3 simple steps to handle change

So! How to make sure you catch & handle your change-related stress in time?

First off, establish a routine or practice that helps you check in with yourself on a regular basis. There’re many options here: meditation is wonderful, but walking or writing in a diary are great alternatives. I think there’re only a few ‘rules’ to the check-in-practice: do it regularly (at least 3 times a week), take at least 15 minutes and don’t distract yourself (not even with a guided meditation).

Second step is about acceptance & self compassion. When you’re going through a cycle of change one of the easiest things is the ‘ignore & push down approach’: ignore what’s really happening & push down the uncomfortable feelings that go with that. This may seem a solid approach when you first look at it: you don’t feel so bad, you can just continue doing what you’ve been doing all along, you don’t have to tell anyone, etc.

Handling feelings

However, and I’m sure that you already this on some level, pushed down feelings come back twice (if not trice) as hard later on. Maybe it will be in a covert way, or as an illness or anger, but they will demand to be dealt with at some point. It’s actually a lot easier to handle feelings in the moment, because they move through your system really quickly when acknowledged and looked at.

That doesn’t mean you allow your feelings to take over. Instead, choose a time & place to sit with them, write about them, name them. Feel them. Do what is needed to let them move through you, like crying, yelling, hitting a pillow. And repeat a few days laters if needed. The less you allow emotions to get stuck, the easier the transition is.

To do this, acceptance that you are in a change cycle is important.

And yes that is though.

Yes it might get ugly.

Yes it can be scary, and sad, and many other things.

But it will also pass and you will still be standing when it does.

The Third step I always take is this:

Make sure you make time to do the things you love to do. Change can be all consuming, or at least when you combine with the must do-things already on your calendar, like take care of your kids & animals, do your job, eat, drink, sleep.

If that’s it, life gets pretty stale pretty quickly.

So to prevent that from happening, I suggest you consciously make time to spend on things you just love to do: going roller skating with your friends, painting that painting, work in your vegetable patch, reading a fantasy thriller or diving deeper in that thing you’re learning about (all things from my actual list :))

This is not waisted time.

I cannot stretch this enough.

Energy is endless, but it has its limits. You may have a full energy-bucket but the stress and the actions related to change will suck it empty really quickly. You need activities and interactions to fill it back up. That’s why you do the things that bring joy: they fill up the bucket.

These are the 3 steps I take to keep sane when I’m going through change. If you’ve been wondering, btw, why the same or similar challenges keep coming up, I recommend this Insta-reel.

What’s your best way to handle change? Share your top 3 in the comments!

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Rosalie Puiman is the founder of The Sovereign Leader and the author of The Mindful Guide to Conflict Resolution. She works with executives and founding teams to bring forth effective, impactful and purpose-driven success. She also offers Human Design readings in private & business settings.